Life change

So something needs to change. But I am not sure what. Any ideas?
I am throwing the question out into the universe. I am opening up my mind to the ideas out there in hopes I might just be surprised....

Tonight I went to church. I don't get to go to "my" church often as it is in Rosemount, MN and I am usually not. This is the church I have been going to since I was in first grade. I was confirmed there, married there and most of all I feel safe there. Tonight was the pastor's last night; she is relocating to a church in White Bear Lake. Her sermon was very inspiring and so I would like to share the main points with anyone who hasn't abandoned this post due to its religious theme. The part that struck me the most was from Romans 8 Versus 38 and 39:
"For I am certain that nothing can separate us from his love; neither death nor life, neither angels nor other heavenly rulers or powers, neither the present nor the future, neither the world above nor the world below – there is nothing in all creation that will ever be able to separate us from the love of God which is ours through Christ Jesus our Lord."
Some days I forget this. Some days I think I am not worthy of His love due to my past or mistakes I might make in the future. Some days when I mess up I think, "Damn it is too late to start over. It is too late to ask for forgiveness from God or anyone else. I am so far from where I think I should be that I will be lost forever."
Tonight my pastor spoke of God's love, and how above all else she is positive that we can not be separated from it. I feel like perhaps this was some simple lesson we were all supposed to learn as children, and I guarantee that if it was, I missed that day in Sunday school. Or maybe I learned the lesson but life's experiences helped me to forget it. Either way I know that lately I feel like I have to do everything perfectly or else... You can fill in the blank with what ever you would like the ELSE to be; it doesn't really matter, and chances are your ELSE is very close to mine. In the end though I will always have God's love. I just need to embrace it. I am worthy of God's love, just as much as the person who cut me off this morning, or the person who didn't call me back, or even worse the person who did call me back but didn't have the answer I wanted...
Right now as I type I feel like life is exactly the way it is supposed to be, mistakes and all. And although I made some mistakes to day, I don't have a job, and my husband is 300 miles away, I am not alone. I am not empty or unworthy. I am surrounded by God's love, and it feels very comforting.
The big trick is to not forget this feeling of calm and serenity. The feeling of God's love.
So I wrote what I was feeling down and shared it with a good friend or two.

Moving

No time for crocheting,
No time for sleeping,
No time for hanging out with friends,
No time for blogging,
No time for anything fun!
I am too busy moving.
So my advice to others out there thinking about moving:
DON'T DO IT!!!!

Okay that said, I am excited to get settled in our new house! :-P

I love a Nurse

This past Thursday 12,000 Twin City nurses went on a one day strike. I was lucky enough to hangout with them on the picket line. Unfortunately, the media and hospitals have done a great job of confusing the public and creating much misunderstanding about why the one day strike occurred.
First of all, it was one day long because any strike breakers would have to be paid for 3 days whether they worked 1, 2, or 3 days. The nurses hoped that this would bring the hospitals back to the bargaining table. No the hospitals would much rather spend the extra money than talk with the nurses and try to reach a compromise. Also the main issue with the nurses was patient care and nursing ratios NOT money and wage increase...
Wow, I just spent 45 minutes reading WCCO's website and the comment section for the RN strike coverage (I was looking for a quote for both sides of the argument). What I came away with was total disbelief. Some individuals were talking about how nurses should just deal with an increased workload and be happy they have a job. I don't know about you, but personally if I were to end up in a hospital I would really prefer my nurse to be working with a patient to nurse ratio that is safe and not just economical. One person even said, "there are plenty of people just waiting for the jobs that you now have." Wow! Really? You would be okay with just any unemployed person walking in and being your nurse for the day? The nurse that I would want working for me is not the one that would do the job for the least amount of money or the least amount of benefits! But I don't know that is just me, maybe I am crazy.
The truly crazy part is that the nurses are not striking over money. They are upset that the hospitals are giving the CEO's huge bonuses and at the same time cutting the pension of the people who are helping to create that large bonus. Nurses are overworked and tired. If you work in a unit where there is supposed to be one nurse to every 3 patients and someone can't make it to work, or an extra patient gets transferred what happens to the extra patients now? Just because the ratio is 3:1 shouldn't mean that every nurse must have all 3 patients during every second of his/her shift! Because then if something does come up there is some buffer room... nobody has to go to a 4:1 ratio. I guess it doesn't matter if it is a 4:1, 8:1, 20:1 ratio until you (or a loved one) are in the hospital and it is your life that is on the line... only then will it truly matter. The only problem with this theory is that by then it might be too late... the hospitals might have won. The hospitals get paid either way. If you live (thanks to the help of a caring nurse) they get paid. If you die (due to under staffing of nurses) they still get paid. It is your family and you that suffers. Think about that one for a second...
I leave you with a few more pictures of Thursday's strike

Oh-fur-cute!

My new computer is so cute! I love it!!!! I used the Sam's Club link to show the specs because when it comes to buying something like a computer I have found NO service plan quite like the one Sam's Club carries. Normally I think service plans are a waste of money because the tend to be expensive, and don't end up covering your item when it stops working. However, for my computer I was able to get a 3 year plan for around $35. When I bought my husband's Xbox I also got a 3 year plan and not only did they pay for shipping the broken Xbox to their facilities, but when they found it was indeed broken, they sent us a check for the amount I originally paid for the console. This was a few years after the original purchase so the price of the Xbox had gone down. We were able to buy a new console and still have some money left over! Having such a positive encounter with Sam's Club and their service plan, I feel it is only right to pay homage by writing my first blog on my new laptop about my experience!

Busy, tired, lazy… no, no, no…

I am trying to think of excuses as to why I have not posted to my blog in the last three days. Really, I think it is out of fear. The second I told people that there was a blog in existence, to which I hoped to make many posts, I began to feel the pressure mount. After all this is not like facebook where I just sit back and watch other people think of witty things to say… No this is the place where I am supposed to think of witty things to say! What if I am no good at it? What if nobody reads my blog? Or worse… what if they do the obligatory read through only while thinking to themselves, “Damn, this feels like homework!”? How embarrassing!
Yes this is quite the conundrum… on one hand I can write to the masses, without the masses ever knowing that I am out here writing… Or I can write to my friends and loved ones and face possible rejection…
Oh what the hell! I have been harassing those who I love for as long as I have loved them. They put up with me on a regular basis without too much complaining, and now I guess I am adding one more thing to their list. Besides we could all use a little more homework now and again!

"If they don't have it tough sh*t, you can get a Diet Coke!"

Ahhh the joys of being married. Jeff and I were on our way to Downtown Books, an amazing (and huge) bookstore in downtown Milwaukee. I mentioned that before we get there, we should stop at Open Pantry and get a Pepsi Max since we have none at home. Jeff tried to use the excuse that it was out of the way, but it is only one block north of the route we were going to take. My sweet husband will usually spoil me rotten, especially since I have been using the line, "Jeffy, the baby wants _____." No I am not pregnant. However, I still think this argument is relevant because women are born with all the eggs they will ever have and that means that right now I am carrying half of our unborn child. So when I need a Pepsi Max it will benefit both myself, and our future child! Jeff reluctantly made the left turn to Open Pantry. Then out of nowhere, he accosted me with his comment!

Well lucky for the both of us there was both Pepsi Max and Pepsi Max with lime. Jeff found out the hard way that Pepsi Max with lime taste like window cleaner. Personally I think it was the universe's way of returning the bad karma that Jeff originally spewed at me.

So off to the bookstore.

It was AMAZING!!!! Two and a half floors of used books and movies. There were also two cats living at the store. One was a fat orange cat, and the other was a long-haired multicolored cat. They were both so sweet and loved to be scratched under the chin. After an hour of wondering around, and still feeling like I had only scratched the surface of awesomeness that lay in 2.5 floors, I chose four books:

Valhalla Rising by Clive Cussler

1984 by George Orwell

Murder on Gramercy Park & Murder on Astor Place by Victoria Thompson

I love summer reading, and I can't wait to dive into each book...

New Beginnings

Hmmm... where to start? Tonight after a late night run to the Cheesecake Factory and a large consumption of caffeine, I find myself reading a friend's blog while sitting next to my husband, Jeff, who is playing Half-Life 2. I say to myself, "Self, wouldn't it be nice to start a blog?" My inner dialog responds rather negatively saying, "Self, you started one before and not only was it boring but you never wrote much." This conversation continued for awhile in my head until a compromised was reached. Yes my previous blog was kind of boring, but that was because at the time I was boring. Much has changed since then and now, although I would not consider my life overly exciting some cool events will be coming up and I will have more to write about; therefore, making my blog less boring. Also by reading my friend's blog I have learned some interesting things about life that are normally "figure it out yourself as you go along" sort of lessons. I have found such lessons quite helpful and much easier that actually learning them on my own as I go along. As a way of paying it forward I will start this blog so that someone else can learn something through my mistakes (instead of their own) and hopefully that will motivate me to write as well. So wish me luck as I descend down the rabbit hole...